When I started writing this blog I always knew it would be difficult to keep up the cadence to which I promised myself, to write approximately every 3 days – twice a week essentially. I find myself already falling behind in that promise, hence the wait for a post. This caused me to check back on one of my early ramblings (Only Connect) about wanting to walk more, eat well and watch less TV.

As my iPhone tells it’s own story this month I’m averaging over 10,000 steps. I’m delighted to report that was pretty much my goal and helped not in small part by Karen doing likewise and walking with me daily. In addition rounds of golf & a longer distance walk with friends have contributed to the total and my ambition to take time to enjoy what’s there on my doorstep.

Food-wise I’m eating fewer takeaways and finding new recipes. The highlight has been a vegetable coconut curry, but I am also finding more and more healthy vegetarian snacks from a vegan cookbook. Home-made hummus and red pepper salsa have become particular favourites, replacing what is my own personal downfall, crisps. And no I have not become a vegetarian.

You will also notice that my TV watching didn’t take a downturn as I attempt to watch each and every episode of Game of Thrones. I am less successful here at watching, therefore successful in watching less TV (does that make sense?). I’m only 5 episodes in to Game of Thrones so a long way to go!

And finally the outcome. I can tell many stories about my weight and fantastical diets over the years but for now let me focus on a small positive. At the beginning of the month I weighed a miserable 16 stone 7 pounds. The above goals coupled with a recognition of the amount of calories I am eating through another app on the phone has led me to reduce this to 15 stone 12 pounds today. Another big contributing factor – as the calorie counter proves – is replacing sandwiches with a (meal replacement) milkshake for lunch. A long way to go before I can stop my inclusion in the obese category but it is a step in the right direction.

Quite often I find a copy of the ‘Dreamers Dictionary’ lying open in the bedroom, Karen checking for hidden meaning in the images of the night before. I, however, cannot remember the last time I awoke in the morning to recall any memory of what happened in my subconscious in the prior 8 hours of sleep. My superpower is being able to sleep soundly (most of the time), but does it deny me the opportunity to dream in glorious technicolor? Or at least the ability to recall the dream?

Perhaps this also points to a lack of imagination on my part. Over the years as primarily a project manager I have been taught to deal with the ‘facts’ in front of me. When dealing with risk I always found it difficult to foresee anything out of the ordinary that could occur (probably why so many of my and others projects encountered delay). And as I sit around post #5 into this blog I am already wondering what I shall pen about next with no clue in my mind.

So is this a blessing or a curse? I guess anyone who suffers sleepless nights because their brain won’t shut down for so many ideas flowing around their head with endless possibilities created by the multiple universes they live in would say there is a down side. But at the same time I’ve never had that killer idea that led me to some great business benefit and made me millions.

I think I have become a very particular variety of binge watcher. Unless I know that a series has completed and I can see the beginning and end of it I am no longer willing to commit to watching it. Let me explain a little more.

The first thing I ever binge watched, and I still believe it to be the finest example of a long running TV Series, was The Sopranos. It happened by accident – I needed a distraction from a regular train journey taken between Glasgow and Plymouth where I was working approx 1 week in 4. The laptop I was using had a DVD player and after experimenting with a couple of episodes, I invested in the box-set of 6 series. I knew there were no more episodes, I knew the size of the total watch, I didn’t watch at the same time as everyone else as it was first aired and thus, avoided or forgot about spoilers.

Breaking Bad was the next thing that I watched in the same manner from beginning to end, it being all present at the start of viewing. It, like the Sopranos, had dips in form but I knew the series number and was prepared to see it through to the end. As such I would encourage anyone else to do the same – it’s as good as the hype IMHO.

However, I am scarred from starting a number of series that have dwindled and been dragged out over far too long. Series 1 was good and I stuck with it hoping that the writers would find a way to give the story-lines a decent beginning, middle and end as I was always taught in English Class. Examples of this include Lost (got to the end – was plain disappointed), Bones (far too many series diluted what once was good US crime drama to ridiculous soap opera) and The BlackList (commits the ultimate crime of main character coming back from dead).

Anyway, at last I can see an end to Game of Thrones which, until now, I have not been prepared to open this particular Pandora’s box. I believe the first 6 series number 10 in episodes and series 7 & 8 are shorter at 7 and 6 episodes respectively. So 72 episodes to watch before the final 73rd episodes airs in just under 5 weeks. This way I will experience the thrill of all the Throners that have waited an extraordinary length of time for the conclusion but invested in a much more compacted 73 hours(ish) of television. I think.

Do you ever sit and think “if only I had time to..”? Well, right now I’m blessed with time to do those things that I choose to do, rather than I have to do and I’ve concluded that I need to connect with a number of things that I haven’t given the focus that they deserve. Likely I have always had this time, but I have wasted it on more trivial things (damn you Candy Crush) so I’m making a more conscious decision to undertake activities and ambitions that are precious to me.

Almost two years ago to the day, Karen and I walked the West Highland Way with two good friends. We walked the 100 mile route over 7 days and whilst difficult, it created a great sense of achievement for all of us. I have far too often lived to excess causing me to be overweight and unfit, the WHW reminded me when I take time to exercise and set goals, that my weight and general health benefit. So the first thing I need to connect with is walking a determined number of steps each day.

Hand in hand with that is taking time to eat properly. A conversation with my son this weekend, who is much better at sticking to a regime than I, has spurred me to again begin tracking what I eat. I love to cook and making time to prepare things from scratch knowing exactly what I’m fueling my body with. Having time to do that, I want to explore more of the cookery books that exist only to gather dust on the bookshelves not only to fuel, but to thoroughly enjoy what I eat.

Third and final resolution is to turn off the TV / tablet / phone and return to reading books and listening to music. It struck me that I only ever turn the pages of a book when I’m on holiday and it is an activity that I find most relaxing. Likewise it is rare that I make time nowadays to listen to music either old or new, again an activity I prepare for on holiday ensuring the iPod is packed.

I realise more as write how precious time is and that I need to be more conscious as to how I spend it. I don’t doubt I will be sidetracked by Netflix or some other game on the iPhone that captures my flitting attention but I am going to try.

So I will start this story at the beginning of 2019. Having just turned fifty the previous October, I had the remainder of the year to begin to contemplate my next ‘career’ move on learning my contract would not be renewed. After returning from a very pleasant New Year break I realised it was not my preference to go back to the 9 to 5, although conceding it may be a necessary evil to maintain the current lifestyle that we enjoy.

Perhaps it was this that also made us ask the question if we wanted to continue the current lifestyle we have. To this I provide some context: Karen and I had become ’empty nesters’ in 2018, our eldest had made a successful career in New Zealand and Son had more recently departed the nest for University in Glasgow. The family home was very simply too big for our needs.

Then the question that was the point of this post in the first place. How much money do we need in the bank to finance the rest of our lives? I phrase it this way in the first instance because it immediately prompts a second and more morbid question, when are we going to die? There are of course many other factors that determine how much money is required, the standard of living, the size of our dwelling(buy or rent), the number of dependents we choose to provide for or not (sorry kids); but the crux of many calculations seems to come down to that fundamental question of how many years left on the planet?

I understand it is never easy to begin writing on a blank sheet of paper so I don’t think this is going to be anything other than difficult. A friend of mine suggested some years back that I begin writing a blog after admiring his own words. I found his musings witty, funny and often touching but did not think that I had the same penmanship in my own bones / head. However, as I’ve now turned fifty, and am both searching to challenge myself and do something different to the norm I’m going to try my hand at this blogging lark.

A few years back I religiously downloaded the photos from my iPhone once a month and applied some commentary to them. I published them through my Facebook account and didn’t really intend for anyone else to look at them (but admittedly I didn’t hide them by making the private either I now realise). What I did intend it to be however was a reminder to things I had done and might otherwise forget and that remains true of it today. And that is also what I intend for the blog.

So primarily it will be for my own use, at least before I become brave enough to advertise it, although I will start as I go on by making it public. I think becoming fifty has coincided with, rather than prompted an interesting time in life, I hope it provides enough material for me to put into words on a (semi) regular basis.

Thanks for joining me!

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton